October

It is now October and if you are anything like me, fall time brings on a feeling of change.

It’s almost like the wind blows you in a new direction, or at least makes you think about one. For me, I believe this feeling happens due to the many years we are in school.

I always knew summer was coming to an end when the mornings became cooler, and the sun went down a little sooner. There was less thoughts of summer play and more thoughts of a new classroom and what outfit I would wear when I went back to school.

Fall for me meant a new beginning with new clothes and a new group of kids in my class. The thought of joining a new club or team was always something I looked forward to growing up. September is certainly a month that opens the doors to a fresh start. It only makes sense that we connect fall with "new beginnings".

September always ends up flying by and before we know it, October begins. The leaves are now changing, and the cool air begins to take over most of the day. There’s still a tiny hint of summer scattered throughout some of those sunny afternoons to remind you to be grateful for those brief moments of warmth.

I’d say fall feels like the shortest season of all, but for me it is the season that reminds me to embrace change. Not to mention, it’s a small slice of heaven for me as I wear my favourite hoodies and indulge in everything pumpkin spice.

As the leaves on the trees change from green to yellows, oranges and reds, it can almost feel like a metaphor for our own changes.

Somebody once told me that change is food for growth. How can one grow if we are not open to change? We can stay the same by repeating the same patterns or we can choose to try something new that will pull us out of our comfort zone. I vote for change because change opens us up to transformation.

Writing is huge for me. I’ve had a journal since I was old enough to write. I’ve been reading books since I was old enough to read. If you’re thinking Duh, we all have! Let me just reiterate what I mean by that. I have been driven to read and write for as long as I can remember. I have a longing desire to connect to myself and others through writing. I have a longing desire to read the words of others so I can connect to a story or maybe even the author or a character.

As our time in Bear River is coming to an end, I cannot help but feel immense gratitude that I get to spend my last month here during my favourite month of the year. October.

I want to share what it has been like to move across the country with my family and leave my oldest son behind in Ontario. I want to share what lessons I have learned, and what I would change if given the chance. What am I most proud of and do I regret leaving Ontario? Most importantly, what will I take with me as we head back to the “big city life”?

September was a month of brainstorming. I asked myself tough questions and I spent a lot of time navigating through thoughts and feelings that would allow me to evaluate what this move meant for me, for our family, and for my relationships with the people I love.

As I sign off here now, I will return with the answers in the coming days. For now, I want you to think about the changes you’ve been thinking about. Allow yourself to be open to those changes. Try not to let October pass you by without making even one small change.

One thing I have learned and will talk about is that change is uncomfortable. Even the thought of change can trigger anxiety or fear for many people. Sometimes change can be downright awful. But change is how we grow into ourselves.

Change doesn’t have to mean we become a new person. Change allows us to be who we are meant to be. Without change, we never really give ourselves the opportunity to know who we truly are.